Envy

By Dhruv Khanduri, First Year

Image Courtesy: Dreamstime.com

Pain at the good fortune of others is how Aristotle defined Envy. Envy is a syndrome, a complex of poisonous thoughts and feelings about people who have what we cannot get. Envy is NOT just wanting what the other person has- that’s greed, and it can inspire us and fuel our own ambition. Envy is something darker, it’s not just wanting what the other person has, it is begrudging them for what they have. You might even hate the person you envy, even if their downfall doesn’t benefit you in any way. Most of the time, envy is the most harmful to the person who envies. Max Scheler (German philosopher) defined it as a self poisoning of the mind. The Bible says that it is the ONLY sin which gives no pleasure (which is not entirely true).

Envy is a basic part of human nature, it exists in all societies and all economic systems and it begins any time two or more people start comparing themselves. People often use the word ‘jealousy’ instead of ‘envy’ when they are very different. Jealousy is defensive, protectiveness over what is yours. Envy is offensive, resentment over what another has that you lack. So when you as an introvert wonder why extroverts are extroverts, you aren’t jealous of that aspect about extroverts, you are envious. You lack social skills which extroverts possess and you start questioning the other person.

Cultures all around the world today understand the evil eye as a kind of a curse cast by the malignant gaze of an envious person. Being envied is the opposite of being loved. So why does one aspire to be ‘the envy of their friends’? Why would anybody want to get envied? Well blame it on you being born a human being. It’s the contradiction of human nature. On the one hand, we need to be loved, but then there is this drive in us, this Homeric striving for fame and glory and riches which is in conflict with our need to be loved. So why do people feel the need to cover up the fact that they envy XYZ? For example: The insanely popular K-pop group BTS is constantly ridiculed for being ‘girly’ and “oh you are wearing makeup when you are all men” and while all those may seem as valid reasons to not like BTS, when you dissect the statements, you begin to see the green layer withering away. The speaker is envious of BTS- now is it because of their talent? Their money? Their looks? OR is it because of all of them? Nobody can say for sure, only the speaker alone knows why he/she has that resentful feeling in the pit of their stomach. When people criticize somebody, it is extremely important to see whether or not it is just envy disguised as genuine criticism. There are two reasons as to why people are in denial over their own envy- one is guilt, the other shame. Shame- because admitting to yourself that you envy someone implies that you are inferior. It wounds one’s ego. Guilt because envy is malicious. In order to maintain that denial we have to convince ourselves that this angry resentful feelings in our stomach is something else. Another way we can reframe feelings of envious inferiority is by transforming them into moral superiority. We no longer have to feel guilty or ashamed of envy if we can convince ourselves that what we’re actually expressing is pure legitimate hatred. A line that perfectly describes envy is- “IF I CAN’T HAVE XYZ, NOBODY ELSE CAN”

Now the real question, is envy bad or good? If you can’t answer this question, then nobody can help you. Envy is go- I mean BAD. To be completely fair, this isn’t a black or white question, there is a lot of green. Envy can motivate you but can get out of hand and poison you from the inside at the same time. Recognizing when one is feeling envious is an amazing start because only then can you work to fix it. It is okay to have green butterflies in your stomach, you just have to teach them how to fly in perfect formation.